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The Shape of Things. (Namely My Bod.)

by verdemama on March 6, 2011

It’s begun. I’m officially getting those “You look like you’re ready to pop!” comments from random passers-by. People seem to be amazed by the way I sport a baby belly. Some women get big and round all over; I tend to only get bigger (and bigger and BIGGER) in the belly, while the rest of my body stays the same size (18 pounds gained so far, thankyouverymuch). It makes for a striking look: no big deal in the back, holy torpedo belly! in the front. And people just can’t help commenting on it, like, extensively.

And they don’t know when to stop.

“I can’t believe you’re only seven months—you’re enormous! Your belly is just so big and pointy! You’re carrying so low—it must be a boy!”

I don’t know why some people think it’s okay to openly critique the way my body looks. It’s like pregnancy somehow puts my body into the public domain, opening it up for whatever brutal discourse spectators wish to dish out.

We wouldn’t say these things about a person’s body who isn’t pregnant, right? That would be completely offensive, even to the most tactless of boors.

“Gosh, your ass sure is huge! Wow, you’re totally flat-chested! Your nose is so long and pointy. Is it always like that?”

Guys can say some totally ignorant things, but ironically, women’s comments are often the worst. They really don’t know when to stop, and not only that, they should know better.

For now I’m just keeping a sense of humor about it all. I’m looking forward to holding my baby girl in my arms, and to once again have the ab strength to not need a forklift to remove my ass from the couch.

Hello, third trimester. Home stretch, here I come.

Vote For Us @!

My big torpedo belly would really appreciate your vote!

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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

TJ Nathan March 6, 2011 at 10:26 pm

Awww, well I for one, think your belly looks beautiful!! It's perfect :)


verdemama March 6, 2011 at 10:44 pm

Thanks, lady. :)


lola March 7, 2011 at 7:59 am

Just consider practice for all the 'generous advice' that will be offered to you by complete strangers for the next 18 years :) You look Fabulous !!!


verdemama March 7, 2011 at 8:23 am

Thank you! I have a two-year-old son as well so I\’m quite familiar with all that awesome advice so many people seem to love to dish out. I\’m still working on the perfect retort for people like that — something to subtlety tell them to shut the eff up but not be too offensive. Suggestions are welcome. :)


Grandma March 7, 2011 at 8:03 am

I feel your pain. One of my best friends at the time said "I can't even remember what you looked like before" which cut to the core (since I'm still offended after 35 years!) I think you look beautiful and can't wait to be introduced to our little girl.


verdemama March 7, 2011 at 8:24 am

Thank you, and what a dumb thing for your friend to say.


Kristy March 7, 2011 at 1:56 pm

With my second, I got a lot of "are you expecting twins?" I think you look great! Now that I have my two boys, and no more to come, I do miss the baby movements of being pregnant. The rest I've conveniently forgotten. :)


Lauren March 9, 2011 at 6:10 am

You look beautiful!


maggie may March 9, 2011 at 10:56 am

i just finished being pregnant- my daughter Ever is 3 months- and i was soooo over all the comments! hang in there, you look wonderful.


verdemama March 9, 2011 at 4:49 pm

Congratulations! Ever is a beautiful name.


mrsnotouching March 10, 2011 at 3:52 pm

I'm jealous how gorgeous you look pregnant! I was the kind that gained all over the place but mostly my face. And the only reason I know that is because people were commenting mostly on my face… :-)


Denise March 13, 2011 at 11:54 pm

I've got the basketball carry, nice and round in front. There is a customer of mine who could not stop commenting on how puffy my face was looking the other night… YES night! After working a full day and being on my feet until about 8:30 at night. Then she was at my baby shower on Saturday and told me that I don't look as puffy any more. GEEEZE, thanks! Yes, I just laugh to myself most of the time. :)


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